Autistic dating guide
It’s not even that the fortress really is empty or that the fairies ate your human baby instead of raising it as their own.It’s that, on the whole, autistic people are queer as fuck.Neither is a good job, a fast car, or a sexy retirement locale.And when men who are promised these things culturally discover that they’re not in fact givens, it fucks them up just as bad as it fucks the rest of us over.Read that last sentence in every way it is intended.
Not only are these dating guides ultimately unhelpful even for the audience they DO have, Thing is, a lot of us don’t get to find that out for decades. You think pressure to be cishet is tough for non-autistic queer kids? And even if the inner voice tells you the manuals are lying or that you’re not really into this sort of relationship at all, by the time you’re old enough to date, you’re good at ignoring or suppressing that voice. After all, that voice was the “crazy” one, the one that didn’t match everyone else’s perceptions of the world and so it couldn’t possibly be “real” or “true.” Nope.
Read THAT last sentence in every way it is intended.
Autistic people are disproportionately NOT HERE FOR YOUR STRAIGHT WHITE DUDE NARRATIVE, because we are disproportionately neither straight white dudes nor particularly interested in straight white dudes. But mix all that shit it really needs to get “better” from posthaste into a lifetime narrative about how you do is wrong, out of sync, “crazy,” inhuman.
In case you’re new to the party, this is my response to Emma’s recent post kicking off our back-and-forth on autism and sex/gender stuff.
Because nothing says “critical analysis” like some good old fashioned therapeutic rantation.
Dan Coulter of Coulter Video is an adult with Asperger Syndrome.