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17-Jan-2020 00:05

They don’t say anything that we girls don’t already know (but always manage to ignore), but now that I am dating again and looking at my past experiences, I’ve put some rules together which I hope will stop history from repeating itself. Attractiveness – I used to think that a guy that was less attractive of me would appreciate me and treat me accordingly. What happens is that when they get you, they start having ideas above their station and think if they got you, they can get any girl. This isn’t to say that you should hold out for a Boris Kodjoe lookalike, I mean that you know your worth don’t go below that level. In Essex, there is a phrase called Ladettes, looks like a lady but can fight like a guy.A guy who is just as attractive as you are is comfortable in his own skin and so will not always be searching for more. Be yourself – we say we want a guy who takes us for who we are, but then we meet a guy and somehow mould ourselves into a ‘perfect girlfriend’, then when our guard is dropped and the walls start to come down, the guy then say’s “you’ve changed”. I could be described as one to some extent, depending on the situation.Parents also are very good at seeing what you refuse to see because you are so wrapped up into the getting to know each other stage.Especially father’s, having played a lot of women in their time; they can spot a playa from a mile off.He should definitely meet the parents before he takes you to bed, so he knows that if there are consequences if all he wants is a hit and run. Tell him what you want up front – Some people say this is a no, no, but I think it is best to put all your cards on the table.Obviously I’m not going to say, tomorrow, I want to get married.

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This time though, I’m sharing this with you guys because that’s the reason why I started this blog.So, now that he has talked the talk, he has 3 months to walk the walk. Girlfriend – he calls you a few times a day, calls you ‘baby’, ‘darling’, ‘sweetheart’, yet when you are out in public, he introduces you by your name, or when he gets a phone call he says something like ‘yeah, I make busy’, or ‘I dey chop’ or ‘I’m with a friend’, in all the time you’ve been dating, no mention of you being his girlfriend.You’ve not even met one of his friends, and you only go out on particular days and he never invites you to any functions.If he sweet talked you into going out on a date, he needs to be doing the gentlemanly duties. Sex – the big elephant in the room in the beginning of all relationships.

How long do I keep him waiting before I give him the cookie?

If that’s what you want, go find them, me, if I have decided that I am going to start dating you, just know that somewhere down the line it could be a year, it may be two, but know the wedding colours are pink and white. Friendship – In the beginning you are getting to know each other, use the opportunity to build up a friendship because passion comes and goes but even though it sounds cliché, your guy should be your friend first.